I have always wanted to stay by myself for sometime, not that I am anti social or anything, just that I think staying alone teaches you a lot about yourself and helps you learn a lot of things!
For the life of me, I cannot go out to restaurants/food joints and eat alone! I just cannot! In office or at home, I can, cause there is no one around me and I am truly alone..but in these public places where everyone’s with their friends, I feel very awkward eating alone. I pay too much attention to what they might be thinking about me, that his girl is just so sad, she has no one to eat with her! The same applies for watching a movie – I don’t think I can every go out for a movie by myself. Shopping? Now that I might be able to do, I am not sure though.
Things I cannot do alone!!:
- Eat outside
- Watch a movie
- Go out drinking/dancing – I’ve seen a couple of people who do that and even I judge them for not having any friends!
- Go to any carnivals/utsavs – I am sorry, bu these places are supposed to be enjoyed with people
Things I don’t mind doing alone or want to do alone:
- Going for random rides on my bike
- Going to the gym
- Going to the beach
- Cooking at home
- Being at home
- Anything at home more or less, I like being alone for that
I have kind of learnt to be by myself in a couple of places though, like in office for example, this new place, I feel kind of left out in lots of places. I don’t know, I am just not able to connect with these people, unlike back in Bangalore, where I was in the centre of anything and everything. Here it’s not that way, I feel low sometimes, cause I just plug my earphones and sit all day while the others are cracking jokes and chilling. It’s not that they are mean and ignore me, they are good people, its me, I am not able to connect with them, I am not able to speak and end up being the quiet one in the corner! Most days, I am completely fine with this, but few days, like today, it really sucks! don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret moving back home, but I really miss my people back in Bangalore!!!